BATMAN DOESN'T LOVE ME ANYMORE.

2.8.03:

Hello. I am Tony Martin, and I have no sense of consistency. I am not upset that I shot to kill a fleeing man in the back with an illegal shotgun, but I am upset that he died. I also believe that people's personalities are set at the age of seven and you cannot deviate form te path you are given, but prison should still be harsher, much like beating up people with hereditry cancer for causing grief to their loved ones.

Also, I wouldn't condone miners who, having their livlihoods robbed from them by an inantely bad person who could excuse her actions thru economic necesities, took the law into their own hands and protected themselves by shooting her. This is because I have a very small mind.

Also also, I am really just an anti-social, gun-totting loveable ecentric landed farmer. However, black people with no property who are anti-social gun-totters are clearly scum. It's not a race thing, cos it's in the bible like that.

Also also also, would you like to see my money? Do you like my OFFICAL FOLK HERO badge? I think it's made of money!!

_chris! // 14:47

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1.8.03:

I wish I could sahe Loz's in ability to not get rankled over Needledick's outbursts but... it just can't be done.

If we let all criminals out early if they said that they'd DO IT AGAIN, would that be good? Would there not be an outcry? Do you think people would care so mucha bout this case if Martin hadn't SHOT TO KILL?? No, people wouldn't. As it is, people have a rpoblem with other people SHOOTING TO KILL. There is reasonable force, and there are revenge killings. This was a revenge killing. Should he be protected from a revenge killing himself? Yes, but only because that's what should happen in the real world. Acording to his own standards of conduct, he souldn't. Because HELLO! REVENGE KILLING MAN!

Also, if you want more police sations, Neddledick, how about paying more taxes? Would that make sense? Yes?? FUCKING DIE YOU CRETINOUS SHITE.

But ofcourse the best part of it all was the complaint that the polcie helped put up a bouncey castle next to their own stand at Pride. Even from Neddledick's way with twisting words, it seems he can't amke it look like the bouncey castle was actually theirs, btu is he honestly complaining about police mucking in and helping other people out? In the community? Isn't that a good thing?

Also, have you noticed how POLICE is completely and totally seperate from GAY PEOPLE, and that there is no overlap between the two, because the Police contain no gay people at all,a nd shoudl in fact treat gay people as if they were persecuted minorities fleeing institutional racism in the own contries and coming here for safety? You know, employing measure's like locking them up until they become straight, or deporting them.

Yeeeh... You can tell he's the own fighting for people's liberty, can't you? And as a final note: why the hell should it matter if ordinary middle Englanders would be appaled at the vey idea of the police putting up a bouncey castle? People who complain about that are too stupid to count, and their concerns are pathetic.

_chris! // 10:59

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31.7.03:

Well, the good news is people are still coming here from googles for Anna Stothard, and as surely most people in the entire universe that could possibly care in any conceivable way must have read her book and come to the only viable conclusion (WHY?), it's probablly Stothard herself, looking for ego-soothing words from lit luvvies intent on getting into her father's address book.

_chris! // 20:54

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Hmm... I have had an idea. To my mind, it is lovely idea. A pure invocation of Sunday's and late summer and the word pleasent and the early mods, youth leaveing clean above their means.

Hand written zines. Can it be done? My hand writting's pretty shit, but can look pretty if I don't worry about people reading it. And yes, this is all very Channel 4's Outside Title Design...

Also, I have somewhat unfortuantely ended up at the conclusion that it should have "It's the sound you hear/whispering in yr ear... " on the front. Why?? Why must KFC: Soul Food adverts do this to me?? I'll be quoting Friendchips next...

But other then this, the whole idea is making me... excited, I guess. It'll be easier then staring at InDesign for hours trying to wrap my head around the logictics of printing it in the end...

Hm. Yes. Footlose and fancy-free. This is the sort of thing I need, having discovered that I'm one third of the way into my pre-uni break and have so far only managed to get so drunk I couldn't feel my face, and crashed my phone at the extact time that I recieved a txt message, leaveing it in constant-tone-and-vibrate mode, which was impressive at least.

_chris! // 15:13

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29.7.03:

I am annoyed with myself, sat on the trin back from London reading Illustrated Ape with the guy next to me reading it over my shoulder. Why didn't I give it to him?? It's £3.50, and it'd be easy as pie to get another copy (ish, with postage, but I've been meaning to subbscribe).

Bah. How cool would it be if stangers gave you weird publications?? Remind me to be a bette rperson in future.

_chris! // 21:58

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28.7.03:

Doing It For The Big Baby Jesus In The Sky: Why Cameron is subconciously crying out for a good punch. /

Lordy! Did you see him on the front of that paper?? he's standing there, looking like a teenage boy who's elder sister's best friend has both REALLY BAD TASTE IN MEN and REALLY, REALLY BIG TITS with two scantily-clad blonde ladies with the headline declaring I AM READY FOR MY VIRGIN BRIDE. Are you dear? Well, that'sncie for you. Want to knw what might make you look a bit less like a fucking arsehole? NOT STANDING WITH SCANTILY CLAD LADIES WHILE STILL GOING ALL NEVER-BEEN-TOUCHED ON US, NUTFUCKER.

Bet's he'd dump any prospecitve monogomous fuckbunny the moment he discovered pictures of her standing around with scantily clad men? I say likely! But anyway... the worst thing about all this, which admitedly is better then the fact that we jsut made a national hero out of a baby-beating homophobe, is that my mother seems to have turned him into a hero for not being a SHEEP! and FOLLOWING ALL THE OTHER SICK PEOPLE! into having sex (she refuses to say the word, and it took me weeks to discover what she was talking about, when she went off on her Dawson's Creek/Hollyoaks mad-on about two years ago... ). To the point where the scantily clad ladies and the big fucking grin on his face were probablly the fault of the photographer ("I bet the pphotographer made sure [he looked happy]". No, really, THOSE WORDS CAME OUT OF HER MOUTH).

I just can't understand this- how did he even win in the first place. Yeh, sure, none of the others deserved to win, but only Scott didn't deserve to loose: Steph wanted to be given a big tree to chow down on to file her teeth away and then when she'd finished she could have made such a big hole in it that it fell on ehr head and killed her, like beavers in cartoons; Ray should ave been taken to one of those namby, liberal north-eest Europe countries where no one ever does anything and everyone's very pleasent so he cna complain about The Man and everyone would agree with him and allow him to air his opinions without ever pointing out that HE'S GOT NOTHING TO COMPLAIN ABOUT; and Cameron is just secretly crying out to be stuck on a big pole and beaten against some nice big rocks...

Fucking christ! Who the hell let him win! That's like letting Lisa win! What the fuck is wrong with everyone's tiny minds?? CRUSHKILLDESTROY.

_chris! // 10:43

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27.7.03:

Most people who read this probably have not got themselves a copy of Magma’s in-house magazine, Graphic. For anyone who does, turn to page 123 (it is the second yellow page, by the way. If page 123 isn’t the second yellow page about people in flats, then turn to the second yellow page about people in flats.). Now look at picture 12. THAT MAN IS LOZ. If that man isn’t Loz, then he looks a lot like Loaz. Enough like Loz to get a post about looking like Loz.

And if you haven’t got a copy of Graphic, by the way, or for some evidently completely unknowable reason can’t seem to bring yrself to spend £15 on a single periodical, then I am sure Magma would not mind you going to one of their stores and looking at it yrself. There is no entrance fee, but everyone in there is possibly prettier then anyone currently one, two or possibly even three degrees of separation from yr close circle of friends. Covent Garden offers many small nooks and crannies where you can go and cry and the meaningless harsh realities of life. They may well smell of wino pee, but one must take one’s succour where one can.

_chris! // 23:02

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